Wut up homies? We just wanted to see if you would take a break from yo social networking to read about all the tight work we’ve been doing.

Lately, we’ve been all environmental and shit. We’re spending so much money to tell you about how you need to use our oil less. Think of it like when your drug dealer tells you to slow down while selling you an 8-ball.

Peace-out from D-rock,
Earnest F. McGovern III.
Senior Vice President — Strategic Marketing Division

Tags: Exxon Mobil